Diversionary Tactics
Jan. 13th, 2006 01:02 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
vollmusSo I'm thinking about getting a laptop, plus a new iPod and a radio remote to match instead of going to France this summer with my class. I mean, yeah, I won't get the chance to go with these people again, and it's highly unlikely I'll ever see them after we graduate, but even though the people obviously won't be the same, all of the schools I'm applying to have good study abroad programs that I fully intend to take advantage of. This isn't my only opportunity to go to France, just my only opportunity to go to France with these people. Who are admittedly very cool, but still. Do I want fifteen days of complete and utter joy in a foreign country with some of my best school friends, or do I want at least a year of bliss before the next laptop model comes out and I have something new to lust after? I really don't know.
I'm at this point in my life where I'm questioning all the really big decisions I used to be absolutely sure of. (Okay, "all" really means two—France and my IB diploma—but who's counting?) It's starting to become very annoying. I don't like second-guessing myself. I hate that the next six months of my life are no longer set in stone, because I just have to think about the what-ifs. Whatever happened to my motto, "Don't question, just accept"? What a punk. Why do I do this to myself? It's not like this is very hard. I just need to shut up, get to work, and be happy with what I've got rather than being pissed off that my dad has the opportunity to have exactly what I've always wanted but doesn't want it himself and therefore won't take it.
Don't question, just accept, you moron.
I'm at this point in my life where I'm questioning all the really big decisions I used to be absolutely sure of. (Okay, "all" really means two—France and my IB diploma—but who's counting?) It's starting to become very annoying. I don't like second-guessing myself. I hate that the next six months of my life are no longer set in stone, because I just have to think about the what-ifs. Whatever happened to my motto, "Don't question, just accept"? What a punk. Why do I do this to myself? It's not like this is very hard. I just need to shut up, get to work, and be happy with what I've got rather than being pissed off that my dad has the opportunity to have exactly what I've always wanted but doesn't want it himself and therefore won't take it.
Don't question, just accept, you moron.
